While rest of the world thinks I am a genius, atleast there is one human on this planet who proclaims me an idiot because I always bring an expired sandwich-bread! Would Newton or Einstein would have checked expiry date on a bread? Being a doctor, I do mean what an expiry means. But, this bloody bread expires within a week, as if all the fungus in the world are waiting for that very hour to infect all the humans. The fury of expired bread-loaf….hooohooohaaaa…..won’t spare anyone.
Well, this may be one idiocy, but there are plenty.
# I always withdraw twice from ATM and play with all the buttons, just to see an irritated face of person standing behind me.
# I always get down to pee when a bus halts even for a minute. I strongly believe, bus always stops to bestow this pleasure on us.
# I love to stand in a busy traffic on Maratahalli bridge (bangaloreans would know travails of it), just to catch a glimpse of dog-sex happening beneath; and as I smile in ecstasy, many passerby bikers join me to create a huge traffic jam.
# I always give tip to the waiter beforehand, because I believe he would fart on my burger to make it spicy otherwise.
# I never put fan on max speed and never sleep directly below it, because one astrologer told I would die of a fan falling on me.
# I have thrown some 437 coins in river ganges from the passing train, since somebody told it fulfils the wishes.
# I love to ease myself in the toilet in running train, but I never use toilet in a flight.
(I believe plane toilets have some vacuum-cleaner mechanism, which would pull my mojo into it.)
# I go to toilet three times every morning, one for headlines, one for editorial and one for sports page reading.
# I pretend as if my vehicle broke down when somebody honks from behind, giving an abrupt stop, jerky starts and slow nudges.
# I recently had a wonderful dinner at a marriage party, and couldn’t find my family because they were sitting in true marriage party happening in some other marriage hall on same street.
# I remember the full name of Pablo Picasso
Pablo Diego Jose Francisco de Paula Juan Nepomuceno Maria de los Remedios Cipriano de la Santisima Trinidad Ruiz y Picasso
..
P.S. Will be back with another post if alive
(I am making a suicidal attempt of eating four loafs of an expired bread while writing this post)
May the odds be ever in your favour. 😂
This is truly hilarious!
***salutes and bows***
Shared it on social media!
Love and light ❤
Anand 🙂
Reblogged this on blabberwockying! and commented:
This is truly hilarious. I would have loved to see Dr. Jha creating traffic jam on Marathalli bridge in Bangalore; sadly I had to leave Bangalore too soon! Salutes and bows to Doctors Saab!!
I can empathise with the flight toilet fear. All that pulling action makes me scared of losing important stuff.
Besides, train toilets are the best. Indian railways mein you can find all sorts of abstract art painted with…ahem…something.
This is getting intelligently idiotic and at the same time humorously fantastic.
Love to Both of you My Dears, Anand & Vamagandhi
Haha. Just can’t stop laughing.:D
Ha ha 😀 now these are called some really good facts :p
Hehe..what a post! How do you really get inspirations for your posts? ;P
Thx. Think I just drag an event from titsy-bitsy family affairs. This was just blurt out on bringing wrong bread 🙂
This was really great. I even shared all your best posts’ links to my friends on whatsapp…specially that Sehwag one..!
You really write great! Keep it up!
Awesome man 😀 437 coins and traffic at Marathalli stop.. Wow! Hope you survive till the next post and for many more 😛
Good one….was engrossed reading till the very end😈
Very hilarious! The underside of Marathalli bridge seems to be a very ‘happening’ place 😛
That flight one cracked me up real hard 😂😂😂 But some were utterly disgusting 😂😂 Loved this Dr.!!
After reading this, I have decided to start tipping waiters and waitresses before my meal too! You know, just to be on the safer side! 😀
Haha 😂 Awesome facts of a critic 😉
Now this had me in the bouts of laughter frenzy… 👍🏻👍🏻
The suicide attempt with the expired bread had me rolling.Well done.
Oooooh. A lot of pee details happening. You’re hilarious, though. Lol!
Hilarious !
Oh my ! I can’t stop laughing.
God bless you…see you soon, if you are alive (and me too…though i don’t suffer from weirdness!)
Your thinking is very bold loud and very detailed. I am sure many connect with you coz they also experience these things err… the dog fuck is a daring thing to mention as is the farty waiter.
Nice to read!
Hello dear, I linked your post to my latest post; bridegroom wanted, urgently. Thank you for making me laugh. Have a lovely weekend 🙂
I’m sure you’ll be back with another post, my friend. You could eat expired bread all your life and dream up odd vocations – I have a feeling you’d tide over it all with your awesome sense of humor!
Reblogged this on vamagandhi.